Staccato Memories

Dispear
honestly i felt complete
and utter dispear
the last moments of this cyborg
that you created in you mind
filled me with sorrow
funny how in just a few lines
you told a lifetime story
i could feel hopelessness
i could feel pain
i could not feel a fighters will
and in those finial moments that i felt
it was as if this creation's life flashed
before my eyes

Wow

thank you for the read.
it was felt

(~:SamMayo

Very unique feel to this. Good write, not great though I thought it could be better. Your use of wording was good. Keep it up.

Peace, Joe

Half man half machine,
You'd think I was the one who invented silence.
[[F-cking amazing. I love these lines; it sounds just like what I would write. ^^]]

Static slides across the television,
Reminds me of your wind chime voice.
[[Again.. I love it. The random (but it fits) description is so capturing . . . ]]

Dire dreams, of my life...
Or lack there of.
[[A little humor? I like it . .]]

Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are dead.
[[I'm not going to lie, I do not know who these people are . . ]]

Thus.
You should PM me and explain that to me.

From what I could read and understand, however, I really enjoyed the poem. I loved your metaphors and descriptions; they were creative and definately not cliche. Keep it up.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 5.5

I simply love the way you wrote this.
Thought provoking, unique, strong.
Worth reading again, and gathering
a new viewpoint, this is a flexible
piece to me. Wonderfully done.

Write On!
Take Care,
Smiles,
*N

Very interesting poem, the flow and structure where both very well. I liked your choice of words and the way it was all put together to make a short to the point peice of art. Keep up the great work.

Peace, Joe