Do you believe in ducks

"If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?"

Yesterday was that past, Tomorrow is the future, Today is a gift...that is why they call it the present.

You don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy running from the bear

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Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do.

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Your moms soo fat she fell in luv and broke it- lol Carter as if u said this its soo gayY!

Life is full of challenge and frustration........................But sooner or later you will find the hairstyle you like.

I see skies of green and clouds of brown and i think to myself wut a very shity world.

I don't see why teachers give us assignments that cant be done in one night, when obviously they are going to be left till then..

Trust me, my life's goal is NOT to make you suffer. I swear. It's to laugh hysterically (and/or maniacally) at your expense, whether it be through bodily harm, Krispy Kreme donuts, or any other sort of kitchen utensil/appliance you can think of.