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Trick me once |
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Chocolate is cheaper than therapy and you don't need an appointment. |
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I hope there are playing cards in limbo, otherwise i'm screwed... |
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Love is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth. |
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Did you know 4 out of 3 people can't do fractions? |
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Girls lie too. So guys, get over it. |
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Life isn't a garden so don't be a ho |
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Life doesn't suck, your life sucks (not to be offensive or anything.) |
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Kids in the backseat cause accidents, but accidents in the backseat cause kids. |
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"If you cant dazzle them with brilliance...Baffle them with bullshit" |