IT'S BETTER FOR PEOPLE TO THINK YOUR AN IDIOT THAN TO OPEN YOUR MOUTH AND PROVE IT

There is no I in ugly but there is a U!!!

My train of thought derailed.

Why when people ask you "what three things would you bring with you on a desert island?" no one ever replies, "A BOAT"

Life is a beach nice shores but full of crabs

Flying is easy.
You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this?

Im the kind of girl that walks into a chair and says sorry

"are you alright?"
...why do people always ask you that when the answer is obviously no?

I'm the type of girl that will burst out laughing in dead silence, about something that happened yesterday.