Big Mac--5 dollars

Deep fried cheesecake--3 dollars

Large poutine with extra gravy--10 dollars

Dying of a freak breakout of the bubonic plague--priceless

For everything else, there's lyposuction

I say we shoot Cupid and see how he likes it.

God made men first because he needed a rough draft before a masterpiece!

--LOL, ily Becks

A cat looks down upon a man, a dog looks up to a man, but a pig will look a man in the eye and see it's equal

Sanity an illusion born from a lack of alcohol

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is, "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, "Probably because of something you did."

Men come from a p$#@% and for they entire life they spend the whole life getting back why? cause theys no place like home

Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all the time and have the time of your life.

“Love your enemies. It really pisses them off!”

Hear no evil, See no evil, Speak no evil.....WTF!!!! Where is the fun in that!!