I got these from my dad but its still weird, funny, and confusing

so...
so buttons on ur underwaer zippers r out of style

heres another one
wat time is it???
half past a monkeys ass and quater to its balls

wrong but funny

If you leave me.............Can I come to?

Mobile phones r the only objects in which men argue that they have the smallest!!!!!!

Life is short and so am I

"Clothing is like psychology, it relects her every mood"

Mark Waldrop/ JNY Designer

I'm not obsessed, just fascinated.

Your momma's so slow when she goes to the store she has to buy green bananas so by the time she gets home they will be ripe and not rotten!

Secrets secrets are no fun
secrets secrets hurt everyone

Im CRAZY! If you know me well enough to agree or you DONT know me well enough to say that cant be at all possible! Its true. My sister dropped me on my head when I was small and therefore Im left with little smarts. So theres the story of my life.

I'm sorry this isn't a quote but go to www.one.org and sign it to help poverty! Spread the word please!