"Love is the slowest form of suicide."

You changes girls as much as u change your underwear

** my nd my friend said that 2 my ex bf Lmao**

A wife just wants one thing, 'trust'. Ha! Myth busted, she wants your rich d*k too.

:@Dont look at me in that tone of@:
*voice*

Why did the squirrel cross the road?
Because he was stappled to the chicken.

Okay this one isnt rofl its just stupid funny...one of my friends told it to me.

Sex is like summer. As soon as it starts to get good, it's over.

Q: What's Michael Jackson's favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Little Boy Blew.

If you play thriller backwards, you can hear Michael confessing all the names of the boys he touched. That's why it is 14 minutes long.

Q: Why did Michael Jackson get kicked out of the school cafeteria?
A: Because he ate all the kids' wieners

Michael says he is going to fight these charges tooth and nail — because those are the only real body parts he has left