Life with men is like a deck of cards:
You need a heart to love them,
A diamond to marry them,
a club to beat them,
and a spade to bury the bastards.

My life sucks
Your life sucks
Let's suck together!

"A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. That's basic spelling that every woman ought to know."

My four fav animals,
1) jaguar in the garage,
2) mink in the closet,
3) tiger in the bedroom and
4) a jackass to pay for it all... :)

Rap is to music what paint-by-numbers is to art

Save Santa the trip... be naughty!

"beats me i planted raddishes"

Guy:You were bein mean
Girl: I kept it PG-13
Guy: Yeah but it was close enough to be interesting!

Student: How long do you want the essay
Tearcher: Make it like a miniskirt, short enough to be interesting but long enough to cover the subject.
(True story my british lit. teacher actually told me this!)

The more i get to know men the more i like dogs