God made mud,
God made dirt,
God made guys,
So girls can flirt.
I hate mud,
I hate dirt,
I hate guys,
but I still flirt.

Q: Why did the blonde stand in front of a mirror with his eyes closed?
A: He wanted to see what he looked like asleep.

Q .. What stops then goes then stops then goes?
A .. A blonde at a blinking red light.

Whatever Fuc?ker!

Men...are like pet rocks. You wouldn't give your heart to a pet rock would you? no! exactly...so why give it to a man???

Women are stupider than men because we date them

I looked into your eyes and saw an angel there...
I looked a bit to the side and laughed!! sory but ur pimples make you look funny, cant help it!

I am looking for a girl not too funny and not too sad, not too ugly and not too beautiful, not too skinny and not too fat, are you the one !!!

My boyfriend said that he would love me forever....then he told me about a sci fi movie in which they proved that forever could only last a couple of day.

Another random quote of brandon!

Did you know that the Titanic sunk seven inches away from new york?
that's where your bathtub is!