I think i just met the girl of my dreams...
but i decided to ditch her when i saw you.

Prince charming was on the way to see you...
but i beat the crap out of him so i could get to you first.

(gotta love those corny ass pickup lines)

You got the buns, I got the weiner, hotdogs anyone?

Youh know wen its love
wen youh keep replaying in your head
of what he did
& just smile duringg class.

...~* You without me?...Baby let's be real, That's like a fat kid missing his meal!*~...

I had a party last night...sorry you couldnt [come]..but your boyfriend did...TWICE

-playing tennis-
him: *hits her in the boob*
her: omg! ouch! *pulls down shirt* you didn't even leave a mark!
him: there was nothing to leave a mark on..

haha
actually happened
dayyum i hate her too

Things not to tell your ex if they tell you how they still have feelings for you, "Dun dun dunnnn~ The plot thickens!"

Wait till he's asleep then cut it off

A peach is a peach
a plum is a plum,
but a kiss aint a kiss
without a lil tounge!

so close ur eyes
nd open wide,
nd give ur tounge
sum exercise!!

Women are like telephones...They like to be talked to...They like to be held....But if you push the wrong buttons you get disconnected.