Like Good Brothers Should

by Suicidal Love   May 4, 2008


A faint glint of hope, resting in his eye
Maybe his sister didn't mean to die

Maybe just maybe, she wanted to live
Just for her life back, anything he'd give

To see her alive, not dead in her blood
He'd fly to heaven, like good brothers should

He'd give his life, just to save hers
But into deaths trap, so slowly hes lured

He couldn't cope, without her by his side
So just to see her, a hero he died

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by PoetryKnight

    Sad that he would end his own life for his sister. and it is sad that there are people that do that. 5/5
    Aaron

  • 15 years ago

    by xoxkatrinaxox

    Oh wow.
    u have talent girl.
    5\5
    xox
    katrina

  • 15 years ago

    by M00TM00T

    I LIKE THIS POEM.

  • 15 years ago

    by Dutch

    Fantastic. Loved it.
    Just exceptional.
    5/5 easy from me.
    xxxx

  • 15 years ago

    by dollwithafrown

    "A faint glint of hope, resting in his eye
    Maybe his sister didn't mean to die"
    &
    "Maybe just maybe, she wanted to live
    Just for her life back, anything he'd give"

    ^^ You used the world "Maybe" too often here, so it became a little bit annoying. Instead of using the line 'Maybe his sister didn't mean to die', you could use a question: "Did his sister really mean to die?"

    "To see her alive, not dead in her blood
    He'd fly to heaven, like good brothers should"

    ^^ That second line, "He'd fly to heaven, like good brothers should" was truly beautiful.

    "He couldn't cope, without her by his side
    So just to see her, a hero he died"

    ^^ I wasn't sure whether to call the ending beautiful or extremely heartbreaking. It's certainly a beautiful *and* extremely heartbreaking poem though.

    Very well done.

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