Leftover Fragments

Splendidly done

Can b related to time, father, brother , friend and a journey from past to present, from tenderness to maturity. Really ua poetry v matured oer d years.... Keep it up... Gud win.

Congrats on the Win sweets... Well deserved:)

Wow...wow....superb...

I like how you have started this of with a question. I detect sadness and perhaps a little bitterness just in this line alone.

I can relate to most of your words because I felt the same way about my older brother who always looked out for me but eventually when off track and the feeling of abandonment was just how you have described it here. You have memories that are now fading and some mementos that you still treasure....I have them too.

I really enjoyed this one...yes, it was sad but it was also very real...to me at least.

Have you ever (there should be ever to add more emphasis)wondered
what a broken memory
feels like?
It's like a
silent morning with no
sun to draw the lines
of the horizon.
Moreover(transition required here, because u are telling more about your idea), It's like
a broken compass that
leads to absolutely no
where.(just a period is sufficient)

Therefore(transition again,because this time it's your conclusion), It's like remembering you.

Piece by piece, I am still
collecting the image we
once shared(omit before because once shared already means past), or
perhaps the picture you
drew for us.(period)
But I was too
young to understand,(comma) or
even too close to see the
world through your eyes.

But you always did(no comma,sentence is very short) and
still do.
You kept me safe
from things, I never knew.
And I grew up in front of your
eyes,(comma) but you were always
the silence surrounding me.

I can still see your childlike smile
in between the seriousness
of your voice and the lingering
bitterness you feel within.
So, I am keeping the fragments:
of what,(comma) I used to know and of what, (comma)
you decided to leave behind.(period)
Because one day,(comma) you will ask
me to remind you of the old
picture you painted us both in.

Rest, your poem is perfect.