I don't know how I missed this! It's so good to see new poetry from you. I've missed your writing dearly Mel. :) I stopped writing for almost a year, and I remembered the feeling of revisiting old poems - remembering exactly how I felt but feeling so disconnected at the same time. This piece stirs up a lot of thoughts in me, and I hope we see something else from you soon.
I've missed your writing, and I can very much relate to this poem if my interpretation is correct.
I feel like poetry has become such an integral part of my coping mechanism throughout life that when I don't write, everything else I'm doing feels like I'm simply putting plasters on my symptoms (e.g. How you beautifully and relatably referred to strepsils).
Once you've done such a deep soul search through writing it's hard to accept it's just gone and part of you will always visit its tombstone, perhaps hoping to reconnect somehow with something that's long gone.
Mel, I cannot express how good it is to see a new poem. I gasped and kind of did a double-take because I was that excited.
You always are so eloquent in your poetry, and the ending lines especially were striking in emotion. It made me think of when we say farewell to something, burying the memories and the hardship, it's hard to come back and revisit. To become vulnerable again.