Misunderstood

I may seem smart

But the truth is,
I spend every day coping.

I spend so much time trying to be sane that I don’t remember the thing you told me 5 minutes ago.

I am smart enough to stay sane.

I may be able to have conversations but there is a different conversation in my head.

Constantly.

I work to live.

But I love to give. Be there for others. Give myself to their souls. Be enough to bring them home.

Yet I’m cold in my own mind.
Trying to remember what my face looks like.
Trying to be the person they describe.

I’m dying inside.

But my face shows another side.

Pride is a word I haven’t deserved.
Because I’ve never understood the word.

Or the things I’ve endured,
while I was trying to survive this world.