The clouds stalk the meadow leisurely
The skies changing into a deep, violent gray
And the first hint of thunder rumbles my chest
I watch their shadows upon the surface
The changing wind pattern in the tall grass
And revel in the sweet smell of oncoming rain
I take a tentative step off the porch
No longer fighting my bodily cravings
To be drenched to the bone
To wash myself clean
My eyes close as lightning first strikes
Casting red and purple stars behind my eyelids
The thunder that follows is exhilarating
Raising the hair on my skin, rattling my ribs
I step further into the field
My senses alive, I take it all in
The new temperature of the rushing breeze
The feel of my hair whipping, stinging my face
Ears ravaged by wind and a lonely wind-chime
The pounding rhythm of my heart
I bury my toes in the grass, head up to the sky
I hear it, it’s coming
Like a thousand marching steps upon ground
Dropping down angrily
The first drop hits my skin, a smile erupts
Then the downpour begins
Soaked through in just a minute, I stand still
Breathing in the new, exhaling the old
Enamored by this fresh awakening
Cleansed by a summer storm
This poem to me is like when you smell something and you are transported temporarily away from your current senses. I feel I can’t give much higher praise then that.
That first line though, what an absolutely perfect start for the storm of writing to come!
Just reading this was cathartic, and sort of makes me want it to be summer again! Every line kept me connected here, this storm that, to others, may be a nuisance, but to you, is a symbol of something reawakening. It reaches you. Makes you feel alive again.
Two lines especially stood out to me:
The first line, the use of "stalk". And then later in the poem, "rattling my ribs".
Excellent visuals and emotions in this! It reminded me of those who stay safe and sheltered at home or watching from a distance, and those of us who go out into it. Whenever I move away in the future, the one thing I will miss about my current area is that I can cross the street and walk just a little bit and have access to this huge field. It's even better when it hasn't been mowed yet, and sometimes in the distance past the crops, you can hear the coyotes.
This was perfection, every part, and I immensely enjoyed reading it!
Thank you. Your comments are always so spot on. This is one of the things I miss the most about home. It rains here but not like home, where I could smell it before it began and could stand in it for as long as I wanted. I’m glad you liked it!
2 years ago
by Lost star
Totally agree with RB on this, it is wonderfully written with imagery that literally envelopes the reader, i really like the tone you've set, I especially like the tempo of the write too through the way you've presented it along with the punctuation it controls the reader through your world nicely. Adding to favs straight away.