Death is just Life's way of saying, "You're fired."

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
"Hold my purse."

Men are like...Mascara.
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

GREAT REPLY

HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

GREAT REPLY

HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd die laughing

GREAT REPLY

HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

GREAT REPLY

HE: Hi, Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

GREAT REPLY

HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why? Dont you already have one?

GREAT REPLY

HE: Is this seat empty?
SHE: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

Im the type a girl u wanna chew all of my bubble gum.. yup the type a girl u wanna chew all of my bubblegum..im the type a girl u wanna take to your mamas house!! ;]