Seen it all, done it all, cant remember half of it

I dont suffer from insanity, i enjoy ever minute of it

Some people are only alive because it's illegal to shot them

I did not chose to be Mexican... I was just born lucky

How stupid can u b if u cant even pretend to b stupid

Life is like a di*k, when it gets hard f**k it,
Cuz noones a virgin cuz life screws us all!!

When god created man he gave him two heads but only enough blood to use one at a time.

Some else came up with this.

"If you don't have anything nice to say about anybody: come sit next to me."

Sarah

Stress smells better in the morning but tastes even better at night.

"Read the Bible, it will scare the Hell out of you!"