Be nice to nerds, chances are you'll end up working for one.

Boys say its great,boys say it's fine but nine months later they say it aint mine..lol

I can't concentrate without my tastebuds.
-Joei

Parents are the only people who should not have children.

Life isn't a garden,
so, don't be a h**

Life with men is like a deck of cards.... You need a Heart to love them, a Diamond to marry them, a Club to beat them, and a Spade to bury the bastards.

I got peas on my head but don't call me a peahead. I put pancakes on my head cuz it makes me extra happy I like shampoo bottles that sit on my lappy!!

Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe him, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you have to touch it to be sure?

"im not a super genius... or are i ?"

- homer (the simpsons)

lol

Okay they have pork chops, and they have lamb chops. What about goat chops??

(Tiffany Voce and Ariel)