Im multi-talented; I can talk and piss you off at the same time.

I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio...

"Every woman should use what mother nature gives her before father time takes it away".

"If you're reading this, congratulations, you're alive
If that's not something to smile about, then I don't know what is."

Jesus is my homeboy

God only created men first because you have to create a rough draft before a masterpiece!

Having a friend is like peeing your pants, anyone can see it, but only you know the true warmth of it.

In A w0rLd 0f ChEeRi0s ... Be A fRuIt Lo0p =D

When life hands you the most rediculous situations, all you can do is sit back and laugh. =)

Suicide hotline, pleaase hold...