When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

Well Behaved Women Rarley Make History.

"If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?"

My Teacher Said This During One Of Our Exams;

My Teacher Once Said;
You May Look Up For Inspiration,
Look Down In Desperation,
But Never Look Sideways For Information.

Your Stupid.... Go Play In Traffic

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day, and may their arms be too short to scratch.

~* I aM hOo I aM, uR oPiNiOn Is NiEtHeR dEsIrEd...NoR...rEqUiReD!!*~

Im lost in the darkness...
so can someone please send me a god damn flashlight??

Never knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run away! Death really hates that!

Two of my best guy friends walk down the hall. one of them is wearing a leather trenchcoat.

"dude, do u kno how many trees were killed to make you jacket?"

"no, but i know how many cows were killed to make your homework."