When life hands you lemons. . . stick them down your bra and make your boobs look bigger!

The popular kid are always to cool for you, but remember this, 20 years from now when you are rich and famous, they'll b working at McDonalds serveing you. Whos to cool now

Two of my best guy friends walk down the hall. one of them is wearing a leather trenchcoat.

"dude, do u kno how many trees were killed to make you jacket?"

"no, but i know how many cows were killed to make your homework."

Life's too short to eat the pink jelly beans last

Im lost in the darkness...
so can someone please send me a god damn flashlight??

For parents, there are few things more annoying than teenagers. And for teenagers there are few things more annoying than parents. So how come there are so many teen parents these days?

34 muscles to frown; 4 muscles to stick up my middle finger and tell them to BiTE ME.

If God didnt want me to do it, he would have stoped me...
(thats what i tell my parents every time they ask me why i did what i did,hehe)

My busines dont concern you so unless your my thong stay out of my ass!!!

Ever get that feeling your free falling but you forgot the parachute and the back up aint working?

Yup i guess its just one of those days..

**Alec**