Life is like a d**k when it gets hard f**k it

When im in a sober mood i worry, work and think,
when im in a drunken mood i gamble, play and drink.
But when my moods are over, and my time has come to pass.
I hope they burry me upside down,
so the world can kiss my ASS!!

If Jack fell on a horse, Would you help Jack off the horse?

Ill stop being a biatch when all guys git hit by cars

Only in america do we put handicapped parking in front of a swimming pool

Same sh!t differnt day!!

Dancing makes for a good time. Dancing like you're in an iPod commercial makes for a better time.-Kelsey

I guess what I'm really trying to say is.... oh look a butterfly

The only reason I'm your dad
Is because Your mom makes
GREAT Pancakes

Tomorrow had been canceled due to lack of interest.