When life…or anyone, for that matter…lets you down, just imagine them in a pink tutu, dancing to Swan Lake!

He doesn’t have the time to write a letter…no, he doesn’t have the mental capacity!

I am not superstitious at all, I believe that it would get bad luck to be that way

I know that you only get what you pay for, I just wish that I was not a big cheap scape so I could someday have something nice

Im no coward dad,
I have a "flight and don't fight" response,
blame in on genetics

Any woman who thinks the way to a man's heart is through his stomach is aiming about 10 inches too high.

"in italy women are more dangerous than shotguns"
- The Godfather

"Sorry, bad foist impression"

Hows about you shut up and next time i posses you I wont pour hot coffee down your pants!

An anonymous person once wrote: "Write a wise saying and your name will live forever." That's kind of ironic because they didn't even give credit to themselves for writing it.