Guys are like tampons
Put it in,
Take it out,
&& throw it away!

Im not an alchoholic.
Im a drunk.

(alcoholics go to meetings)

Im not santa

but you can still sit on my lap...

REHAB is for quitters

SQUIRRELS:

natures little speed bumps

My indian name is RUNS WITH BEER

The top ten reasons i procrastinate:

1.

I would do me

333

im only half evil.

My parents said i could become anything i wanted

so i became an a. s. s. hole