When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then, give the lemonade BACK to life and order MORE lemons!!!

May your life be like toilet paper.. Long and useful! =P

You know you're really lame when you start to quote yourself - me =P

I fianally realize what she has that i don't... diseses! LOL!!!

If your sexy and you know it
round your lips
If your sexy and you know it
round those lips
If your sexy and you know it
and really wana blow it
If your sexy and you know it
lick those hips

Go buck a fuffalo

This delinqient is having sex with your honor student

Constipated people don't give a crap

I'll be sober tomorrow but you'll be ugly the rest of your life.

" You remind me of my next boyfriend."