THERE ARE NO KNIGHTS IN OKLAHOMA

Don't underestimate the knowledge of stupid people.

Driving is like the 80/20 rule,
you're 20 you go 80,
you're 80 you go 20!

Is it good if a vacuum machine sucks?

ME: Are you naked?
Ky: I dont know...

HEY! I just heard, a short bus tipped over and I know how you dont like to wear your helmet because its hard to lick the windows. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.

If you are having a bad day, remember, It could be worse: You could be a conjoined twin, with a gay brother, who has a date tonight and you are the only one with a butt hole.

Its such a nice day. I think Ill surprise everyone by not taking my medication.

There is a report of a drunk, naked person riding in a Big Wheel down Main Street. Do you need me to come get you again?

Once in a spelling bee my opponent couldn't get "erect". I, however, could.