Do you want to know what really bugs me? What? No? You don't want to hear me complain? Okay..

Sometimes people look at me... And they're worried... That I'll... Reproduce...

Have you ever layed on your bed... And looked up at the stars and wonder to yourself... Where the Hell is the roof...?

Ever see a parsnip? The first time I saw one, I thought it was some kind of retarded carrot.

I'm not the girl your mom warned you about,
Her imagination was never this good.

My karma ran over your dogma.

I thought about you naked twice today.

I'll stop stabbing, when you stop screaming.

Men, can't live with them, can't stuff them in your trunk.

When life hands you lemons, stick them in your bra to make your boobs look bigger!