I don't want to be a chicken
I don't want to be a duck
Sooo kiss my butt butt butt!!!!

Call me a bench warmer
Cuz I ain't playin'

Boredom can kill a person.

The other day I went to put money into my wallet only to find a spider had moved in, I hadnt used it in so long!

Ninjas can't catch you if you're on fire!

-saw it on a hoodie I really want :)

First Person: Did you know Micheal Jackson died?
Second Person: Wha....?
First Person: Yeah, he ate a ten year old weiner.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

--W.C. Fields

When everybody is out to get u, being paranoid is just good thinking

not mine

People like you are the reason we have middle fingers

You know what I hate? Indian givers... no, I take that back.