A good friend would bailyou out of jail but a best friend would be sitting beside you saying " were in a whole heck of a lot of trouble but danm that was fun"

If we werent suppose to mispronounce words, then why do they spell them so funny?

Problem is I've had to wait all day, now my patience is whispering impatient thoughts

Hey… you ever see a dog in a diaper?
…….uhh….
XDlol
R.M.D.S.

A good quote is an E=mc2 of a poem. A good poem is an E=mc2 of a story. A good word, at the right moment can blow the world away.

I do not claim to be smarter than specialists, except in their chosen field!

Choose a colour!

If my Gran taught me anything it’s that earthquakes are just god farts

If the ambiance is right, you'll get your high on a mocktail in a cocktail glass, as it is a guilt-free drink.

Mahol sahi ho to jo nasha whiskey ke glass me paani peene se kahin hota hai
Woh darr ke mare paani ke glass me whiskey dal kar nahi hota hai!