These tears of blood falling, breathing has ceased but nothing is as scary as losing you again....:( (kinda bad)

I accidentally rear ended a car at a stoplight.
The driver, a midget, got out and yelled at me, "I'm not happy"
I leaned down and replied, "Well then, which one are you?"

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

xD lol had to.

Directions:

To num physical pain, use ice pack.

To num emotional pain, use ice cream.

Side effects: freeze burn and vomiting.

Right, cut down on the melodrama. I'm working on it. And while I'm at it, I should probably stop talking to myself.

I'm in my own little world, but its ok, they know me here.

Why is it that when we transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when we transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

Cheek to cheek
butt to butt
everybody bust a nut!

ha

Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch it to be sure.

I like escalators
because the can never break
they can only become stairs

"sorry of the convenience"
-Mitch Hedberg