Dear diary, I wish you were a taco.

Teacher: Did you dye your hair?

Me: No, it's naturally blue.

Haha, true convo.

I want my own dictionary. It will be called "Webby D, Dictionary For Retarded White Rappers".

SANTA IS A WITCH!! BURN HIM AND HIS PINT SIZED FOLLOWERS!!

Sometimes I get really depressed,
Then I remember that I have huge boobs
And that makes everything better.

When I use big words it makes me feel smart. :D

Even after Tuesday the calender says, W T F S S M
W T F S S M= What The F*&% Somebody Shoot Me

I applied for a job in a mental institution, they said i need to log 24 hours with a retard, You wanna kick it tomorrow.
....I got crayons

I hate escalators,
I tripped once and fell
down the stairs for an hour and a half.

Right U have 10 fish, 5 drown, 3 come back to life. so then How many fish do you have left? Stop counting u retard. Fish cant Drown you idiot.