If at first you don't succeed, try chewing it.

Sometimes I wish I were you…Just so I could be friends with me

If guys had periods would they brag about the size of their tampons?

If you sprinkle when you tinkle,
please be neat and wipe the seat...

my grandma has this hanging on the wall in her bathroom.....

When life gives you lemons throw it back bcuz it could have given you money

You might've heard I roll with a dangerous crowd. We're crazy, we laugh a little too loud. But that never hurt anyone, because only the good die young.

The best angle to approach any problem is the tryangle.

Ignorance killed the cat, sir.
Curiosity was framed.

not to offend anyone but i got this in an email

why were there only 100,000 mexicans at the march on monday?

they could only find one van

again not to offened anyone i have friends that are mexican and they thought this was freakin funny

I am not random i just have many tho... oo0o0o0o0 SQUIRREL!!