Hell froze over! lets go melt it! *grabs blow torch* "what are you doing?" *throws blow torch into closet* "Nothing Mom!"

*Sings*
"My poke'mon bring all the boys to the yard, they're like "Do ya wanna trade cards?" Damn right I wanna trade cards, I can beat you, I got Charizard."

Sex is like air...
It's not important until ur not gettin any!!

If life hands you grenades... Pull the pin and hand them back!

Why are roses the symbol of love when roses always die? my sis told me its supposed to be fake roses but wouldnt that mean your love was fake?

"Like a midget using a urinal, keep on your toes"

I got this quote from two of my best friends.

"when your mad it takes 47 muscles to frown, but it only takes 4 muscles to get up and slap the motherf^@*er in the head"

There are only three types of people in the world: those who can count and those who can't...

Your momma is sooo ugly the last time she got a peice of a** was when her hand slipped through the toilet paper.

Fighting for peace is like fu**ing for virginity!!