The condom says to the tampon.."I hate you!..you put off my job for a whole week!!" then the tampon says " How do you think I feel?? If you dont do your job right my jobs put off for 9 months!"

An anonymous person once wrote: "Write a wise saying and your name will live forever." That's kind of ironic because they didn't even give credit to themselves for writing it.

Gargling twice a day is a good way to see if your throat leaks.

You & your rumors have one thinq in common
-- you both qet around --

"A repair shop:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)"

I'm not crying...
i'm just dehydrating myself!!

Friends dont let friends drink and drive.. there beer might spill all over them..

None of us are virgins... life has screwed us all!!

Hell froze over! lets go melt it! *grabs blow torch* "what are you doing?" *throws blow torch into closet* "Nothing Mom!"

I have a question that I don't want to ask. Okay, I'll give you hints. The first word is "do" and the last word is "me".