Positive thinkin is like ths:
"A Little bird in da sky,U L00k up&it SHITS on ur eye;U dnt mind&dnt cry;U jst thank God tht COWS dnt fly!"
(ddnt mke it up)..

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

I g0t this 0ff my c0usins t-shirt and i th0ught it was funny.....

L0ST: Sister & Dog

REWARD 4 D0G

You know America's reached its limits when we start bombin countrys we cant even pronounce.

I'm jealous of him, he gets to be with himself all the time.

My brother thought an Angelfish is a fish that is dead...

Optimists say the glass is half full
Pessimists say the glass is half empty
I say "Are you gonna finish that?"

Fat Albert called...he wants his stomach back

Friends are like condoms....
They help you when things get hard...and sticky

F.uck f.uck f.uck a duck.
screw a kangaroo.
finger bang an arangatang.
support your local zoo.

HaHaHa