"It's better to be pissed off then pissed on"

Not only does it float my boat, it sinks the rest.

"No-one's a virgin life screws everyone!"

I wanted to kill the sexiest person alive-

Until I realized, suicide is a crime.

How come flies fly but monkeys don't monkey?

Another wonder of the world

If you can dazzle the world with your knowledge then baffle them with your bullshit.

This Is This Cat
This Is Is Cat
This Is How Cat
This Is To Cat
This Is Keep Cat
This Is An Cat
This Is Idiot Cat
This Is Busy Cat
This Is For Cat
This Is Forty Cat
This Is Seconds Cat

Now Read the THIRD word only! :D

Whoever said nothing is impossible has obviously never tried slamming a revolving door.

He said.......
why do you wear a bra, it's not like you have anything to put in it

She said......
you wear pants don't you?

I accidentally rear ended a car at a stoplight.
The driver, a midget, got out and yelled at me, "I'm Not Happy"
I leaned down and replied, "Well Then, Which One Are You?"