I have to be me. Everyone else is taken.

Why is it that when we transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when we transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

I accidentally rear ended a car at a stoplight.
The driver, a midget, got out and yelled at me, "I'm Not Happy"
I leaned down and replied, "Well Then, Which One Are You?"

Who says im E v i l ?!
I'm jus an innocent girl who likes having fun with torture
That's all =) <3

I'm so bored, I think I'm going to go help the dog chase cars! =D

This Is This Cat
This Is Is Cat
This Is How Cat
This Is To Cat
This Is Keep Cat
This Is An Cat
This Is Idiot Cat
This Is Busy Cat
This Is For Cat
This Is Forty Cat
This Is Seconds Cat

Now Read the THIRD word only! :D

I'm the girl that can watch hundreds of horror movies and not get scared but would scream at the top of her lungs when toast pops out of the toaster.

Lost my job as a suicide hot line operator today. Apparently, "I bet you won't!" is not an effective prevention strategy.

I like turtles because theyre so chill. They dont hurt anyone. Theyre just like, Hey man, I want to swim, and maybe eat some lettuce. But Im gonna take my time getting there, Im not in a rush. Because Im a turtle.

If you drink ten glasses of milk and try to move a wall you cant
but darling drink ten shots of vodka that wall moves by its self