Have you ever met that guy.... you know That guy?.... neither have I.

If one night
A fat man comes
And stuffs you in a bag
... do not freak.
I told Santa
I wanted you for Christmas.

People say that age is just a state of mind.
I say its more about the state of your body!

I like to stand near ATM machines, and when people type in their codes i yell 'got it!' and run away!

Sharing is caring so obviously i dont care!!

Fun Size?

How the heck is eating less candy fun?!?

The only thing worse than being alone is being with you!

When life gives you lemons, make orange juice.

Then sit back and watch everyone

wonder how in the heck you did that.

There's a point in your life
when you get tired of chasing
everyone and trying to fix everything
but it's not giving up.....
It's realizing that you don't need
certain people, the BULLSHIT
and the DRAMA they bring!

A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do... a woman's gotta do what a man can't do!