Smile, it confuses the hell out of people

When life throws you lemons....Buy some vodka!

" Rap started When a couple of guys Who were up to no good Startin makin trouble in my neighborhood..."

Attention everyone! I'm sorry but no one can say my name anymore. It has been worn out. Someone was screaming it all night. I apologize for any inconvenience.

Everything's possible? Have you EVER tried slamming a revolvable door?

Do you ever wonder...
who was the first person to see a egg come out of a chickens butt and said...
I am going to eat that?

You remember that one time when we did that one thing and you did that other thing with that thing that turned into a thing but it never really was that one thing? Remember?

Too often we lost sight of life's
simple pleasures.Remember when someone
annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face
to frown BUT... its only take 2 musclesto extend
you arm and Bi#@$-SLAP that motherf#?@$ upside the head

A women once said that a man is
like a deck playing card you need
A Heart To Love Him
A Diamond To Marry Him
A Club To Smash His F#?@$ing Head In
A Spade To Bury The Bastard

Drastic times don't call for drastic measures. It calls for sitting down, shutting the hell up and thinking things through before you fcuk it up more.