Don't let a guy run his string cheese through your grater before you're married.

May the flies of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch......... AMEN

You are like a tattoo on my derriere,
A pain in the ass that is always there!

"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back than it's meant to be. Otherwise, hunt it down and kill it."

Ashes to Ashes
Dust to Dust
If it wasn't for me
your thing would rust

Last night one tear dropped out of my eye, i asked it "why are you out?"..Then it said,"There is someone so beautiful in your eyes now there's no room for me."

Dating nowadays has become more of a profession, if you get fired, you can find a new job...

A Womans Heart Is Like A Pack Of Cards

A Heart To Love Him

A Diamond To Marry Him

A Club To Hit Him Over The Head

And A Spade To Burry The Git

You're the G to my string...=]

Men are like lamps...
They aren't very bright...
And it doesn't take much to turn them on...