Who ever said love was forever, didnt know about Jennifer Lopez.

I rather be
smok'in hot
then hang with you
and be
smok'in pot

When I see someone having an embarrasing clumsy moment I laugh, not because I find it humourous, but because it reminds me of myself.

"Why do we have middle fingers?"

"Because i cant tell you how much i hate you with my pinkie"

Ive used up all of my sick days so im calling in DEAD!

Got a problem with me
SOLVE IT
Think I'm trippin
TIE MY SHOEs
Can't stand me
SIT DOWN
Can't face me
TURN AROUND

Goths are depressed vampires who have sex with animals.
- Kevin Murray

" There is a big difference between hippies and tree huggers. Hippies are stoners who are all like world peace man! Tree huggers are stoned hippies with serious issues."

Don't interrupt me while I'm talking to myself!

Personally it's not God I dislike, it's his fan club I can't stand.

~Agent Orange