Apple was considering making an iPod for kids but apparently, the name 'iTouch Kids' didn't sit too well.

You know you're bored when You Google yourself

Notes to self only work if you remember to read them.

So you're so straight eh? so is spaghetti till you heat it up ;)

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

Friend at house: Hey you have a bathroom?
Me: Noooooo, we shit outside.

Twinkle, twinkle,
little s!*t.
Name one guy
you haven't f&&&ed.

Instead of "lol", try "lsimhbiwfefmtalol". Laughing silently in my head because it wasn't funny enough for me to actually laugh out loud.

I only drink on days that start with a T; Tuesday, Thursday, today, tonight, and tomorrow.

Gr8 news every1! The world is NT going 2 end in 2012. I just found a Can in the cupboard dat has a 2014 exp date :) lol