Son: mom, when will you be a grandmother?
mother: when you have a wife and son or daughter
son: what's next?
mother: nothing. i will die.
son: then i won't take a wife, for i don't want you to die!

a real story

You cant climb a mountain, until you take the first step!

Life is difficult,
Full of obstacles
And challenges
But when you fall down,
Stand up, rub off the dirt
And ask ,"Who the hell pushed me?!"

There is no chance unless you take one

If the world was upside down everyone would be falling

Mirrors don't talk, and lucky for you they don't laugh...

My mom said this to me:
god, im so happy for fabric with spandex. just shove in the jiggly parts and zip.

i replied saying:
unhealthy weight issues that'll make your teenage daughter turn anorexic.

Sometimes I think of each day as a new puzzle to put together, unfortunatly today i was missing a piece

If my pillow could talk it would need a physciatrist to sort through all the problems I've shared with it

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.