When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity. - Albert Einstein

I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them. - George Bush

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. A. Whitney Brown

What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?

How Many Roads Must A Man Walk Down Before He Admits Hes lost?

The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable. - Mrs. White, (Clue 1985)

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.