I like sports because of the balls.

The only reason you don't swim is because it's never been a half our since you last ate.

Live brunet or die trying

My hair is blue... again.

I'd kill this geek but he has no life.

My favourite colour is all of them in an arch.

If the ocean were vodka and I were a duck
Id swim to the bottom and never come up
But since it aint vodka and I aint a duck
Just pass me the bottle and shut the f**k up

Hello. Would you like to speak with the man in charge, or the woman who knows what she's doing?

"The mOre u study,the mOre u knOw.The mOre u knOw,the mOre u fOrget.The mOre u fOrget,the less u knOw.sO wHy STUDY??"..

Sitting at the edge of the pond. He looks so happy. The little warty, grey toad. His big eyes staring at me. Then outta no where...

SMWACK!!

Stupid bird decided to eat him...

~~~~~~~~` True story