I dont like your shirt take it off

*somethin i told a guy*

Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in 'Mother In Law', they come out 'Woman Hitler'?

Sex is emotion in motion.

Men get laid, but women get screwed.

Good girls blush during naughty scenes in the movies. Bad girls smile because they know they can do better.

Zim: who put bacon in the soap?!
gir: i did it myself!!

Boy: why you were a bra you have nothing to put in there
girl: you were pants dont you?

Me:hey mandy guess what! *snickers*
mandy: what?
me:guess where i saw your bf at!
mandy: where?
me: at KUM AND GO (get it? LOL)
mandy: 0.0 what!!!!! your sick!!!

(real conversation)

Ok, im not racist... How many jews can u fit in a car? 2 in the front 3 in the back and about a thousand in the ash tray

This is our fate.
im yours