If life hands you grenades... Pull the pin and hand them back!

A drunk mans words is a sober mans thoughts

#1 reason it sux to be a penis: because your master strangles you all the time

AK47......WHEN YOU ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY HAVE TO KILL EVERY MOFO IN THE ROOM

98% of teens are currently Bringing Sexy back. You are part of the 2% that Sexy NEVER left.

I HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM......I GOT 2 HANDS BUT ONLY 1 MOUTH

HEY! I just heard, a short bus tipped over and I know how you dont like to wear your helmet because its hard to lick the windows. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.

Do You Member The Time On The Train????
I Stuck My Ass Out The Window Nd Then U Stuck Ur Head Out && EVVERY1 Thought We Were TWINS

I like your pants... do you think i could talk you out of them??

People r like slinkeys, basically useless, but so amusing to watch fall down the stairs!!!