When thingz go wrong as they usually will and enerything seems all uphill when friends are low and depts are high when you wanna smile but can only cry, when u feel like you wanna quit dont come to me i dont give a shit

Don't think of yourself as an ugly person, just a beautiful monkey!!=P

The only thing keeping me from a diet .. is FOOD

I'm not smiling at you...
I'm trying not to laugh.

Isn't it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?

If Abercrombie decided that breathing wasn't "cool" then half the teenage population would suffocate in 24 hours.

He said: I don't know why
You wear a bra, you got
Nothing to put it in.

She Said: You wear pants
Don't you?! =]

I said 'no' to drugs.........
but they just wouldnt listen

"You're my friend, Sara, but we just don't fight enough to be best friends."

WHEN THE VERY FIRST MAN DISCOVERED THAT COWS HAVE MILK... WHAT DO YOU THINK HE WAS DOING??