December Rain (Tanka)

by Cindy   Mar 8, 2011


December Rain (Tanka)

Endless betrayal
Deathly cold December rain
Crippling love's soul
Trapped by your deceptive lies
Alone now with pleasures ghost

Written for a club challenge.

Written by: Cynthia Graver
Feb 20, 2011

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Latest Comments

  • 8 years ago

    by anand singh

    Whatever the style or form, you have a way of expressing them beautifully in your waesome writes.
    In this short piece you've described betrayal quite vividly.
    Take care my friend.
    Paul...

  • 8 years ago

    by anand singh

    Whatever the style or form, you have a way of expressing them beautifully in your waesome writes.
    In this short piece you've described betrayal quite vividly.
    Take care my friend.
    Paul...

  • 8 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Shouldn't "pleasures" be "pleasure's"? Just wondering.

    I loved the depth of this tanka, it was beautiful and haunting at the same time. The idea of December rain and betrayal ties mystically together.

    God bless you Cindy and keep writing please!

  • 8 years ago

    by debbylyn

    Great imagery...how the cold hearted can rain into our soul...nicely done on the form!

  • 8 years ago

    by Sungrl And Mrs Whatsit

    Very effective...
    **************************

    ps.....This piece..however different it is in the final analysis, reminded me of the following:

    Shakespeare: Sonnet 97

    How like a winter hath my absence been
    From thee, the pleasure of the fleeting year!
    What freezings have I felt, what dark days seen!
    What old December's bareness every where!
    And yet this time removed was summer's time,
    The teeming autumn, big with rich increase,
    Bearing the wanton burden of the prime,
    Like widow'd wombs after their lords' decease:
    Yet this abundant issue seem'd to me
    But hope of orphans and unfather'd fruit;
    For summer and his pleasures wait on thee,
    And, thou away, the very birds are mute;
    Or, if they sing, 'tis with so dull a cheer
    That leaves look pale, dreading the winter's near.

    one could easily do less than remind someone of Shakespaere...huh?
    '-)

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