Sometimes I scare the hell out of myself

Conscience, or in other words, THE TORTURER OF THE MIND!!!!!!

Take my advice...and dont listen to a word i say

Whoever said 'ignorance is bliss' is a complete and total moron and should be shot in the head.

Philosophy of exercise:
Mrs. Binney's: no pain, no gain.
Mine: no pain...no pain.

My exercise regime: up down, up down. And now the other eyelid.

A balanced diet: a cookie in each hand.

" This is an A & B conversation so C your way out of it before E jumps over D and really Fs you up G"

They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.